A woman decided to have her portrait painted.
She told the artist, “Paint me with diamond rings,
a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets, a ruby broach
and gold Rolex.”

“But you are not wearing any of those things,” he replied.

“I know,” she said. “It’s in case I should die before my husband.
I’m sure he will remarry right away, and I want his new wife
to go crazy looking for the jewellery.”

WHO DOES WHAT

A Man and his Wife were having an argument about
who should brew the coffee each morning.

Wife :
You should do it, because you get up first,
and then we don’t have to wait as long to get our coffee.
Husband :
You are in charge of cooking around here and
you should do it, because that is your job
and I can just wait for my coffee.
Wife :
No, you should do it, and besides,
it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.
Husband :
I can’t believe that, show me.

So she fetched the Bible, opened the New Testament
and showed him at the top of several pages,
that it indeed says ………..
“HEBREWS”

DONT FOLLOW THIS NICE COUPLE

A man and his wife were having
some problems at home and were
giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM
for an early morning business flight.

Not wanting to be the first to
break the silence (and LOSE),
he wrote on a piece of paper,
“Please wake me at 5:00 AM ”
He left it where he knew she would find it.

The next morning, the man woke up,
only to discover it was 9:00 AM and
he had missed his flight.
Furious, he was about to go and
see why his wife hadn’t wakened him,
when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, “It is 5:00 AM . Wake up.”

Please Dont Read This Joke and Blame me.

This is crime story.

Five friends lived in a room.
They are SOMEBODY. NOBODY, MAD, BRAIN, FOOL
One day ….SOMEBODY killed …..NOBODY.
At that time BRAIN was in bathroom.
MAD called police.
MAD: Is it police station???
Police: Yes, what is the matter??
MAD: SOMEBODY killed NOBODY.
Police: Are you mad?
MAD: Yes, I”m MAD.
Police: Don`t you have BRAIN?
MAD: BRAIN is in bathroom….
Police: You FOOL?
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MAD: No, FOOL is reading the joke…

A funny fwd from a random friend..

Long back I just told my team leader that I want leave for pongal. Today morning he told me to send mail to him because he has to fwd that mail to HR and from tomorrow he wont be coming to office till jan 15th of next year.

So I composed a mail to him..

“”"
Subject : Leave

I wont be able to come to office from 12th to 21st of Jan 2007 as I am going to my home town. Consider this as a leave.

Thank you.
Vineel.
“”"

All of our teammates stay in the same room, including my TL and Project Leader also. After composing the mail I asked my TL ” Mail kaise chahiye? Ye chalega?”

He read the mail and laughed like anything along with me and read it louder telling others to hear. Everyone laughed and my project leader said ” sahi tareeka hain mail bhejne ka”

After laughing a lot I discarded the mail and asked my TL ” tumhi batao tumhe mail kasia chahiye”

My TL then said, ” mujhe mail bhejke bahut ehsan kar liya. Mujhe ye mail HR ko fwd karna hain isliye aisa bhejo ” and told the content of mail.

“”"
I would like to take leave from jan 12th to 21st. Kindly confirm this.

Thank you.
Vineel.
“”"

And he said ” aisa lag rahan hain ki mein apne aapko leave bhej rahan hoon. Poora mujhe hee bolna pada”.

Lucky to have such colleagues and seniors.:)

This is all about my first feast. Recently I started cooking in my room and one fine day(rather night) invited five of my friends for dinner. It was a great(??) experience. The remaining blog will be in telugu to make it more funny.

Now the real story begins.. sodi Naresh ni pick up chesukuni vacchaka… Ashish gadu and Sayan came.. Mohan gammune vacchi kurchunnadu.

So mundu vantaloki vaccheddam.. items decided … Vankaya pacchikaram petti, dondakaya vepudu, tomato pappu , charu and perugu..

So mundu cooker lo first trip annam petta. Cooker history loki vaste ..adi chinna size cooker. 4 members kanna yekkuva mandiki saripodu. (Maree anta chinna cooker konukkovala kakkurthi kakapote) . Abba inka poorthiga cheppaledu kada..intaki aa cooker konnadi kadu.Mixer konte oka Rice Cooker, hot pack, nonstick tava, iron box, coffee/tea flask, enamel kadai,oka cool pot free annamata. So offer bagundi kada ani konesa.

So rice rendusarlu pettali. Oka ginni lo rice inko ginni lo pappu rendu cooker lo